Matchmaker
by ItsukaFuuryu
Summary: Intergalatic love issues? Call Midge Ronarap. full summery inside. and yes, it is ZADR. don't flame me but do R
1. Midge, the new girl

I'm sorry fans of the Gryffindor Girl and the Slytherin Seeker, but this HAD to be typed. I can't take it anymore. it was BEGGING! yes, my fics talk to me. Yes, i am insane. 

**Full Summery**: the day Midge Ronarap came to Hi-skool was the day the world was turned upside down and inside out. She loves the paranormal and chases every dream Dib does (but she is NOT a Mary Sue! You know me better than that!) She thinks Zim's entertaining as hell and has she meets the two boys, she makes a new project...getting them together forever! And of course, Insanity insues... But the real trouble starts when Tak returns along with the arrival of a mysterious boy names Dek. And what's our new group of fighters to do when the Irken Empire declares war?!

Pairings: ZimxDib b/c I'm obsessed; OC love and I dunno about Gaz and Tak. Make that what you want, I guess.

Disclaimer: Only Midge and Dek r mine. I own nothing else. I wish, though. grrr

Without further adou...

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MATCHMAKER

Chapter 1: Midge, the new girl

Dib looked from his doodle of Zim being captured to see Ms. Grudge open and close the classroom door. Dib couldn't believe his eyes when he saw her. She was a bit taller than him (Dib just starting his growth spurt of DOOM!), making him the second tallest the class now. She had blonde hair that was pulled back into a spiky pony-tail and bright blue eyes. But that wasn't what surprised Dib the most. She wore a black t-shirt that displayed the silver logo of "Mysterious Mysteries" along with dark, slightly faded jeans and black boots. Over that, she wore a black trench coat that look almost identical to his. Dib seriously thought someone had created him the perfect girl. Just one problem...

Dib had recently discovered that he liked guys...

Zim was observing the new girl, as well, as she leaned against the wall and observed the room. Ms. Grudge had went out to talk to some stupid human in charge. Zim narrowed his eyes at her. She looked like a girl version of the Dib, yet not as hideous or big-headed. Nor was she as pale.

Ms. Grudge re-entered the room and the girl stood up straight, but her arms were still crossed. She caught Zim's radiating gaze.

"You gotta staring problem, Green?" the girl asked cooly, flipping her spiky blonde bangs out of her face. She didn't seem automatically suspicious of Zim like Dib-monkey had been, but she still eyed him. Zim, however, felt he had been insulted, and leaped onto his desk and pointed at the girl.

"FLITHY EARTH MONKEY!" Zim shouted. "The almighty ZIM! can stare at whomever - Ow! Ow! Hey! Quit it!"

The girl had grabbed hold of Zim's finger and began to bend it back. She let it go as Zim commanded, giving him a light smirk as she buried her hands into her coat pocktes. Dib snickered and Zim threw him glare. The blonde girl noticed this.

"Will you please introduce yourself so I can get along with my lecture about the evil of squirrels," Ms. Grudge demanded of the girl. "Or I'll send you to the underground classroom!"

The girl sighed, not seeming intimidated at all. Dib already admired her. Not afraid of Ms. Grudge, not thwarted by Zim. Where did this girl come from? He rememebered Tak and got on egde a bit, though the girl didn't seem to act like Tak at all.

"Hi, I'm Midge," the girl said non-chalantly. "I came here from Ravenburg. I'm fifteen like most of you. Um...I like video games, history, shopping and reading. I'm a helpless romantic, though I don't like stuff that's horrendously mushy. I love Japanese anime and chocolate. Oh, and squirrels." She grinned at Ms. Grudge, causing the teacher to frown and glare. "I love squirrels."

Dib stifled another snicker. Out of ther corner of his eye, he could have sworn he saw Zim smirk as well (which he did). So, he was impressed with Midge, too?

"What's that on your shirt?" Torque asked from the back of the class.

"This?" Midge asked, pointing to her shirt. "Oh, it's the logo for 'Mysterious Mysteries'. It's like my favorite T.V. show. I love paranormal stuff."

"Dib sighed. God had made him the perfect girl after he had realized he didn't like girls. How ironic.

"You should get along w/ dweeb over there," Zita said, indicating Dib. Dib rolled his eyes. He had learned to ignore it by now.

"Don't get any ideas, though," Torgue added. "We all know Dib's a queer."

"That's enough," Ms. Grudge said in a bored tone. "Midge, take your seat next to Dib. It's time for my lecture."

Somewhere in the middle of the pointless lecture, Dib felt a constant tapping on his shoulder. Dib finally turned to see Midge, staring at him.

"Are you really gay?" Midge asked point blank. Dib rolled his eyes but nodded.

"That's disappointing," Midge replied, " 'cause you're pretty cute."

Dib blinked. "Erm...thanks," he said. He was about to continue his doodle when Midge spoke again.

"So, do you have a boyfriend yet?" she asked. She then noticed the doodle of Zim hand-cuffed and Dib laughing triumphantly. "Ooh! Somebody's into bondage!"

"What?!" Dib exclaimed. "This is Zim! He's the alien sitting over there!"

"Really? Cool!" Midge said smiling. "You like an alien?"

"No! I don't like him!" Dib snapped almost too quickly. "Were arch-enemies."

"Did you know enemies have the best sex?" Dib was so taken aback by her statement, he almost fell out of his seat. Midge giggled. "Mr. Gracful, huh? Whoa!" A paper ball came charging through the air, hitting Dib square in the skull. dib uncrumpled it. In very harsh writing, it said:

_'You think having a new ally will help you, Dib-stink? Think again! The almighty ZIM! will smite you even with you're new girly-friend!  
MUAHAHAHAHAHA!_

_-Zim_

_P.S: What's a 'queer'?_

Midge snatch the note from Dib's hand and scribbled the message "Jealous much?" and then went on to explain the answer to his question. Then she added:

_'If you like him so much then tell him, you green weirdo.'_

_-Midge (the blonde girl)_

She crumpled the ball and tossed it back to Zim, ignoring every protest that came from Dib.

"Are you insane?!" Dib asked Midge.

"A bit," Midge replied, grinning broadly. "I believe in aliens and ghost and stuff so i must be, right?"

Dib stifled his on-coming grin. "You just did something really stupid you know? What did you do that?!"

"For the hell of it," Midge replied. "Besides you know it's true," she added in a low mutter. Dib didn't hear, thank goodness. "So, what's your name again?"

Dib stared, "Dib," he replied. Midge smiled.

"Well, I'm Midge. And considering you believe Zim's an alien, I'm guessing paranormal stuff."

"Yeah," Dib replied. "I'm plan on being a paranormal investigator."

"Really?! Oh my gosh, me too!" Midge slapped the Dib's back...hard. "Dib, I think you and I are going to be good friends!"

Dib sighed, but smiled. He had never had a friend, let alone a best friend. It'd be nice to have someone to talk to that didn't involve screaming insults.

"And I'll help you with your Zim problem," Midge added. "You too would be so cute together, you know."

"I told you I don't like Zim!" Dib yelled as the bell rang. Everyone stared as Midge walked with Dib to lunch.

This was going to drive him crazy.

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You can't become what you already are, Dib.

well, there's chapter one. Love it and review and stuff.


	2. the Apology

Alas! is chapter two! already! OMG!

Disclaimer: Only Midge and Dek r mine. I own nothing else. I wish, though. grrr

and here we go!

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MATCHMAKER

Ch. 2: the Apology

At lunch, Midge scanned about the cafeteria, tray in hand, looking for Dib. She finally found him and waved at him as her pace quickened. He waved back lazily. At least she knew he wasn't put off by her bluntness.

However, as she crossed the cafeteria to Dib's table, she saw Zim at a table far off, excluded from everyone else, all by himself. Midge had always had a soft spot for loners. She frowned at this spectacle, the turned to Dib, holding up a finger to tell him to hold on a moment. She crossed to the side to Zim.

"What is she doing?" Dib asked in complete shock. "Does she know what she's doing?"

"Your voice angers me," Gaz told dib darkly. "Besides, maybe she knows you like him and is going to put in a good word for you."

"Why does everyone keep saying that?!" Dib snapped. "I do NOT like Zim!" Gaz opened an eye and growled slightly. Dib hadn't realized how defensive he was being. why was he being so defensive?

Midge sat across from Zim as he poked at his food. At least Midge guessed it was food, though it didn't seem all that edible. When Zim finally looked up and noticed Midge, he narrowed his eyes.

"What are you doing here, human_**filth**_?" Zim asked harshly. Midge blinked

"Look, I'm sorry for what I did back there," Midge said sincerley, hoping Zim would know what she meant. Actually, Zim didn't seem to care.

Midge cleared her throat, but continued to talk. "So, your name's Zim, right?" she asked. Zim looked at her.

"I am the almighty ZIM!" Zim proclaimed. A few people stared and Midge blinked again.

"Okay..." Midge said, rasing an eyebrow. "I"m Midge." she smiled a bit, but Zim just stared at her. An awkward silence followed as Midge cleared her thraot again.

"So...what's with you and Dib?" Midge asked right out. Zim raised his eyes to her.

"The Dib-monkey and I are enemies," Zim said. "And one day I will take out his brain and melt it into soup!"

Midge cocked an eyebrow and folded her arms. "So _**you**_ must know enemies have to best sex, right?"

"Eh?"

"Because you sound like you're seriously into some S&M or something."

"Eh?" Zim asked again. "What's that you're talking about?"

"What? Sex?" Midge asked. She remembered what Dib said about Zim being an alien. "Aliens don't have sex?"

"I don't even know what that word is, you Midge-worm," Zim said, folding his arms. Midge felt a grin creep across her face.

"Ask Dib," Midge said. "He can explain it better."

Zim leaped over the table and grabbed Midge by her shirt collar. "You will tell me, filthy Midge-thing!"

"Let her go, Zim," Dib said in irritation, coming up to the two. Zim released Midge, but glared at Dib.

_If he hates Dib so much, why did he just listen to him?_ Midge thought. Dib sat by Zim, but with a large bit of space between them, but they were still beside each other. Geez, if they hated each other the least they could do is be consistant.

"Why are _**you**_ here now, Dib-stink?!" Zim demanded. Dib glared.

"I'm here to keep you from hurting her," Dib said, indicating Midge. MIdge rolled her eyes.

"AHA!" so it is as I thought!" Zim yelled. Dib and Midge looked confused.

"What are you on about, Zim?" Dib asked.

"She's your mate! Isn't she?!" Zim said, suddenly laughing. He stopped when he heard another person's laughter. A feminine squealing giggle. Midge's laughter.

"Why do you laugh, puny earth girl?!" Zim yelled. Midge sobered, turing to Dib.

"Do you want to answer that Dib?" Midge offered, fighting more laughter. Dib rolled his eyes. Zim blinked, but came to a realization.

"Oh, that's right," Zim said, poking Dib's head. "You don't like females." Dib nodded silently, slapping Zim's hand away. Midge sniggered, feeling extremely entertained as Zim remembered what Midge said.

"Dib-monkey," Zim said, actually looking sincere. "What is 'sex'?"

"What?!" Dib asked, jumping back. He turned to the blonde girl who was was laughing hysterically. "Midge!"

"So not my fault, Dib," she said through her laughter. "I didn't think he'd actually ask you!" Dib narrowed his eyes at Midge, who simply continued to laugh.

"I demand you tell me now, Dib!" Zim yelled at the pale boy.

"Well...it...well," Dib tried to explained.

"Oh my gosh," Midge said. She walked around the table and whispered in Zim's none existant ear. Zim's eyes widened as he felt the antennea under his wig perk some.

"That's _**disgusting**_!" Zim said in outrage. "_**That's**_ how you reproduce. Eww!" Zim shuddered. "_Germs_."

Midge giggled. "It is fun, though, according to my friends back in Ravenburg. I wouldn'tknow though, however. Just like you Dib!"

"Do you have an inner monolouge at all?" Dib asked the blonde girl. "And how would know?"

"In reverse order," Midge said, gesturing about with her hands. "It's painfully obvious. Even to me. And as for my inner monologue, I killed it and buried it in the back yard."

"Ooh!" Zim said, suddenly excited by the discussion of violence. "Did it not adhere to your wim?"

"Something like that," Midge replied smugly.

"Your 'friend' is diabolical, Dib-worm!" Zim observed. Midge stifled another laugh. "I approve!"

"Thank you - I mean why do I need your approval?!" Dib yelled at Zim. Zim simply contnued his smug smirk and Midge giggled.

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Yeah, Midge thinks just about every thing is funny. But that makes her entertaining, no?

plz review


	3. A Midnight Walk

yeah, these chapters will get longer. Believe me, they will b/c I can't stop myself. Oh, you learn some stuff about Midge in this chapter, but not alot. Oh, she's not exactly like Dib, so don't go judging her just yet. But the two of them having these similarities works with the story.

chapter warning: brief allusions to alcholism and Midge has a potty-mouth

Disclaimer: Only Midge and Dek r mine. I own nothing else. I wish, though. grrr

let's see how I do this...

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MATCHMAKER

Ch. 3: A Midnight Walk

Midge came home to her new house, shutting the door behind her. The fifteen year old girl began running upstairs, but her mother called her.

"Midge," Senna Ronarap called in a slurred voice. Midge sighed and trudged into the kitchen, where her mother opened pizza boxes and held a half-full martini glass. Midge gave her mother a weak smile. She wasn't too far gone yet. "How was you first day of school?"

Midge hesitated. Her mother never really approved of the girl's chosen profession, so telling her mother that she had met a boy almost just like her and an alien was not the best idea. Midge took a breath.

"It was okay," Midge told her mother. "I met these two guys, Dib and Zim. They were pretty cool." Midge walked over to the fridge and took out a Pepsi. Anything else was either vodka, sherry, wine coolers and some mixers. Midge sighed again. She'd have to go grocery shopping tomarrow. "I think they like eash other though," Midge added.

"Both boys?" Midge's mom said. "See, Midge, there's something you could do. You could be a matchmaker."

"Mom, please-"

"Honestly Midge," Senna said to her daughter, pausing to down the rest of her martini, "this _**weird stuff**_, just isn't-"

"I'll be in my room!" Midge announced, racing upstairs to her room. Her room was her sanctuary. Along the walls lied posters of random paranormal stuff - ghost, aliens, the X-files, Mysterious Mysterious, etc. Her computer sat in the corner where she played her computer games and attempted to contact her friends back in Ravenburg. She stared out the window to the stars and sighed.

"Daddy," she whispered to herself.

Around midnight, the loud music she was blaring became less soothing. She kept it on as she climbed out her window, grasping the panaling that held a large vine of small blue flowers. Perhaps a night out of the house would do her some good. Midge buried her hands into the pockets of her trench coat, whish she noticed was quite similar to Dib's. It was a cool, quiet night as she slowly put one foot in front of the other. She wasn't worried about her mother. She was passed out by now by now, and had never worried about Midge at all.

Midge found herself on the far side of the neighborhood, still trudging. She wasn't even bothering to use the side walk. Who else would possibly be out at this hour? She got her answer as the toe of her boot scuffed a rock, kicking it across the way.

"Aha! You're min now, Zi - Oh," Dib said, looking slightly embarrassed to see the blonde girl as she raised her eyebrow. Dib lowered the laser gun in his hand. "What are you doing here, Midge?"

"I could ask you the same question-" Midge replied, folding her arms. she would have continued w/ questions if Dib hadn't suddenly shushed her. Midge gave him an indignant look as he jerked into the bush he had popped out of.

"I just heard his voice," Dib said, looking around.

"Who's voice?" Midge asked. Her answer came in the form of a large blast that threw Midge and Dib into the street. Midge shook her head as Dib fixed his askewed glasses. They saw as Zim appeared upon a large red robot. At least, it looked like Zim, except instead of hair sat two thin antennea andin place of his usual lilac eyes were two large crimson orbs, staring at her and Dib in sheer amusment. Midge got to her feet and helped Dib do the same.

"You won't get away with this, Zim!" Dib yelled aiming his laser gun at the robot. He blasted a few times, determined to take down that pesky alien menace. However, he had bad aim, and the person who did bring down the alien was the blonde girl beside him. Midge rolled her eyes as she took out her own blue and green laser gun, aiming at the spot she had designated as the weakest on the robot. The robot lost balance, causing it to topple over with Zim in it with a yell. He and his device landed in a heap of smoke.

"Is he okay?" Dib asked, not looking at Midge. Midge dusted herself off.

"Shall we check?" Midge said. She wasn't worried...a lot. They approuched the pile of scrap and began moving stuff around, Dib more quickly than Midge. Dib gave a horrified gasp and Midge ran to his side. Now she was worried a lot. Dib pushed more debris aside to show an unconscious Zim covered in cuts and bruises.

"Oh crap!" Dib said, dragging Zim from the wreckage. If Zim died...everything would be ruined. It wasn't like Dib actually _**cared**_ about Zim's wellfare. He just didn't want to look like a jerk when he exposed the existence of aliens. He ignored the odd pain in his chest. Zim _**had**_ to be alright. He was...Zim.

"Oh, fuck, Dib!" Midge said, on the verge of tears she rearely showed. "I...I didn't mean to! Oh, God, Dib, I'm so sorry!"

"It's not your fault," Dib said, still feeling that weird pain in his chest. "You didn't mean it." He picked up Zim's crumpled form and turned to Midge. "Come on. We'll fix him at my house."

"Dib," Midge breathed softly as they began to walk. She placed a hand on his shoulder. "Are...are you crying?"

"No!" Dib snapped, befor ehe realized that was, indeed moisture in his eyes. Midge stood in front of him, her arms folded.

"Why are you crying, Dib?" Midge demanded. She knew he was, and why would if this was what he wanted? For Zim to be totally helpless so he could finally expose him? Dib looked up at the slightly taller girl, blinking more moisture from his eyes.

"I'll tell you when we get to my house," Dib told Midge. they quickly traveled a street of so over to Dib's house. As they walked to dib's bedroom, the house was eerily quiet. Dib hoped Midge would understand that it needed to stay that way. Luckily, she didn't say a word. Not even when she noticed the time the clock on the VHS/DVD player displayed: 1:12 AM.

Dib sat Zim on his bed and began to helpless dig through a first aid kit, trying to at least wrap up the wounds and clean up the blue blood that oozed from them. Dib sighed.

"It's easy to hate him, because hate doesn't cause you to get hurt," Dib explained. "I'm not saying I like him, either it's just...no one ever talked to me or even paid attention to me...before Zim. Sure all it is, is yelling, insults...him trying to take over the world and me trying to stop him but...it's something."

Midge felt a surge of empathy for the pale boy as he sat at the aliens side. Midge turned back to Zim, who was still unconscious on Dib's bed. "At least his PAK's okay."

"His what?" Midge aske, sittingin the chair at his computer desk. Dib glanced at her.

"The thing on his back," Dib explained. "It's what keeps him alive and gives him his personality." Midge continued to stare at the somber looking Dib. She crossed the room and put a hand on his shoulder. Hmm. Perhaps she seriously had been on to something.

"AH! What am I doing here!" Zim yelled, seeing the two filthy worms as he opened hsi eyes. "What...you... YOu thin you can defeat ZIM! this easily?!"

"Zim, chill out, dammit!" Midge told him, noticing Dib in a fighting stance. He was obviously regreting this. "For your info we just saved your ass!"

"What?! WHAT?!" Zim pointed a shaky finger at Dib. "You...you DARE touch ZIM! You have spelled your DOOM! Dib-worm!" Zim pounced on Dib, and the two of them tumbled around on the floor, knocking a couple of nick-nacks off Dib's dresser. Midge slapped her forehead.

"Damn," Midge said. "Boys! Stop it!"

"I'll remember this the next time I try to save you life, Zim!" Dib yelled in Zim's face as the twoo wrestled for dominance. Needless to say, Zim was winning.

"I did not ASK for your ASSISTANCE Dib-monkey!" Zim protested, using his strength to roll Dib over and pin his face into the carpet, locking his arms behind his back.

"That's because you're stupid and stubborn- Oof!" Dib said almost calmly before Zim shoved his face into the carpet again.

"I am not the stupid one here, _**Dib!**_ And after I make you into my helpless slave, I will turn your friend into my test subject!" Spider legs emerged from Zim's PAK and he shoved Dib into his wall, giving him a twisted, conniving smile. "And I'm going to have fun doing it! Oh, so much fun!"

"You're not having fun with anyone, you dumb alien!" Dib screamed.

"Dib! If you and your boyfriend don't keep it down I'll make sure you two can never do that again!" Gaz shouted from her room.

"We're not-" Dib tried to say before Zim covered his mouth with hsi hand, still grinning at Dib evilly. Dib glared, but noticed something quite unnatural about his anatomy. What?! No way this could be truing him on! No way in hell was Zim turning him on!!! Dib looked at Zim, trying to maintain his glare, which was becoming increasingly difficult as he stared into those ruby orbs. They stood there in silence, as suddenly Zim's stare softened and he loosened his hold on Dib. Zim allowed his clawed fingers to slip from Dib's lips, feeling his bottom lip drag with them for a moment. Midge smirk in anticipation, which was beyond to alien and the boy's knowlegde. All Dib knew was that strangness that lied behind crimson. All Sim knew was the strangness that lied behind amber.

Zim sobered, wondering what the hell was his problem. Why wasn't he destroying the Dib on sight? Why did he, an Irken Invader, suddenly find himslef staring into Dib's eyes, and unable to harm him at all? In fact, he had the feeling to feel his filthy human lips against his own. Zim shook his head and glared at DiB, bouncing on his spider legs out the window.

Midge stared at Dib, who looked shocked as all get out. She turned back to the window, watching Zim hop down the road.

"He's got the right idea," Midge said. "I'll see you later, kay?"

Dib just nodded, thundstruck. He didn't even watch Midge crawl out his window. No way that has happened. No way Zim had jsut left without so much as a threat...so much as an evil laugh. Dib sighed. Perhaps some sleep would clear his head.

But first, he needed a long, cold shower.

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heh heh. that was great. the wrestling thing sounded dirty.

okay, maybe midge kinda is a tiny bit of a mary sue, but please dont' let that turn you away. I love you all!

plz review


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